Surrender = Faith

This is my first blog post.  It is a fairly winded story but it has some very encouraging and uplifting events.  So please bear with me and try to make it to the end!

Last year, my wife Jin, traveled to S. Korea with her pregnant sister to visit their family.  My sister-in-law was halfway into her pregnancy so she scheduled a visit to the doctor for her check-up.  Jin went along with her sister and mother.  Since she would be at the doctor’s office anyway, she decided to have a check-up herself.  During the examination, they conducted an ultrasound which discovered a weird “tumor-like” growth on her uterus.  It was no ordinary growth.  It was something that the doctor had never seen before.  All she (the doctor) had were the ultrasound images.  The doctor told Jin that she needed to have surgery right away to cut a piece of the tumor out and perform a biopsy on it.  So just like that, she was admitted into the hospital that same day.  She never even had a chance to go back home to get her things.  

Jin was terrified.  It is terrifying when you have a tumor growing inside of you and the doctor doesn’t know much about it.  She just went in for just a normal check-up and was admitted into the hospital the same day and couldn’t go home.  Needless to say, she didn’t sleep well that night.  

Now I was back in Oklahoma City and received the news over the phone.  She called me and told me that they found something in her uterus that wasn’t supposed to be there and that the doctor had no idea what it was.  My heart sank.  All of a sudden I had that “butterflies in the stomach” feeling.  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.  During the call, I was filled with fear but I had to stay strong and sound confident that everything was going to be okay.  I told Jin not to worry.

After the phone call, I just sat there thinking about what just happened.  Many thoughts came across my mind. “What if this was cancer?” “What if there was no solution?”  “What if I lost my wife?”  My human mind asked all the normal questions.  I lost my father to cancer when I was a young teen.  My human mind was starting to weaken.

Then all of a sudden, it was like the voice of God came roaring into my home.  “Why do you doubt me?  Why do you forget my promises?  Do you not know that I love you and Jin?”  And just as quickly as the fear intruded my heart, I was quickly filled with an overwhelming blanket of comfort.  What was I worried about?  Why would I even fear?  John 16:33 was resounding in my mind: “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”  I was reminded that the worse thing that could happen to us, Jesus has already endured and defeated.  He truly does love us! He loves Jin and would not let anything happen to her no matter what my human mind thought.  That love was the reason the cross devoured Jesus but then was defeated and destroyed through the power of God.

We had to wait a week before we got the results from the biopsy.  What a long week that was.  Jin called me before she had to make the trip to the hospital to visit the doctor.  She was nervous, but during that week, something happened to her.  She learned to let go of her life and just give it to God.  She surrendered all control.  I mean, what control do we really have in our life?  She realized this during a worship event at her mother’s church and she gave up full control to Jesus.  This was a giant step for her. 

She finally met the doctor.  She had great news for Jin: the biopsy came up negative!  

However, we were now faced with how to remove the tumor.  They could just go in and simply cut it out, but there was a huge risk of permanently damaging the uterus and preventing any chance of having a child. Leaving it in comes with the risk of the tumor growing to a larger size that could cause problems or turn cancerous in the future. The second option gave us a chance to have children, but it would be dangerous for Jin.  We were faced with a tough decision.  She left the hospital not knowing what to do. 

Upon the request of the doctor, she returned to the hospital about a week later.  The doctor was debating which path to take as well.  The doctor wanted to take another look at the tumor once again so they set up an ultrasound.  When the doctor was scanning the area, she had this confused look on her face as she was looking at the monitor.  She looked shocked.  She just said “how can this be? I can’t believe this.”  This of course scared Jin.  She asked Jin if she noticed anything different about her health within the past week.  She said no.  The doctor told her that she couldn’t explain it, but the tumor had shrunk down short of disappearing altogether.  She said it didn’t make sense, but it was gone!!

The doctor asked Jin if she noticed anything bizarre in the toilet or if she noticed any weird blood or clumps.  Jin had nothing like that happen.

“Did you do anything different this week or noticed anything weird happen?”  the doctor asked.

And Jin said “No, all we did was pray all week.”

The doctor was speechless.  She had several of the other doctors who was familiar with the situation to take a look at the reading as well.  Sure enough, they confirmed that it had almost completely disappeared and was no longer a threat.  Surgery was no longer needed.  The doctors couldn’t explain it and the reason was that there was something greater at work here.  Something that was un-explainable.

God showed us that He is in control and that we really do not have any control or power over our lives.  He promises us in scripture that He has a plan for us and that His plan for us is perfect and pleasing.

We experienced the fullness of God’s peace when we were able to surrender our situation to Him.  We were completely at His mercy for God to do to us what He pleased.  Our faith was our only strength.  Our only hope was in Jesus.  That’s the perfect recipe for God to work in our lives.  Our God came through gloriously!  Because of that, we had no other desire than to worship Him and share this story with the intent of bringing all glory and honor to His name.  

My hope is that this story reaches someone out there who may be going through a very scary time in their life like dealing with health issues.  Put all your hope in Jesus and watch Him do wonders, not only to your physical health, but to the level of your faith.  Once you can truly let go, you can watch Him work.   True joy comes in knowing that there is someone much stronger and greater in control, and that He loves you and wants what is perfect for you.  

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